Resolutions

In the spirit of 2009 and all resolutions that get broken by Jan 31, I have decided to make a list just for the heck of it.

1. Stay in shape

This is a mantra that I inevitably end up chanting every Sunday night after a week of non-stop mooching, alcohol-fueled merriment and other forms of debauchery. My moment of truth arrived when I finally realized why Ma always makes me wear one of her skirts. Call it an ego trip or anything, but she seems to derive a glimmer of satisfaction when I turn blue from sucking in my stomach while trying to fit into that darned thing.

So, considering that I will be stuck in this ol' body of mine for the next 60 years (god-willing!), I’d better make sure that this machine stays well-oiled until the last stop.

2. Stop mauling my nails

At one point, I had whittled one particular fingernail until there was nothing left but the cuticle. Sure, my hands are great for shock value, but who knows when I will run out of cotton buds and need proper-length talons to dig out some earwax.

3. Stop eating crap at work

See resolution 1.

There are still a 1001 more resolutions in the pipeline. I could, for instance,

Do stuff that makes me happy

Stop sweating the small stuff

Be a better daughter/sister/girlfriend/friend

Save more

Read more

Write more

Articulate better

Change careers

Be more giving

Be more considerate

But hey, life starts with a step at a time. Onward and forward!